It is early January and the holidays are over. I'm feeling a strong drive to get moving! For New Years this year my husband and I spent the time leading up to midnight seeking God. We did some praying, some reading, some talking, and some connecting with each other as well. I had a list of questions that I've been waiting for direction on and I went into that night with great expectations. Later in the evening two of our dear friends came over and another friend joined via Face Time. (Don't you just LOVE the iPhone?!?)
It's quite exciting when you hear from God. For me it's not usually audible, but it is a thought I wouldn't have had on my own, a quickening in my heart, to be quite honest, it is the thing that keeps me going in dark times when I wonder whether my projects will ever come to fruition. If God told me to do it, it keeps me strong and it allows me to surrender, I'm just following orders.
For those of you who might be curious, here are some of the questions on my list...
How much should we invest in Psych Assess?
Should I hire a personal assistant?
Should I go into a partnership and allow John to become a publicist for the book Rawly and I are writing?
Should I continue to cut back the hours of my private practice to work on these projects?
What car should we get?
There are a few other questions as well, but for now, the rest will stay in the private realm. :)
These questions had been bothering me for weeks. I obsessed and lost sleep over them and was over it. I feel in my spirit that 2012 is going to be a big year and I don't want to miss out on anything God has for me. So I came after Him this weekend.
What are your questions as you begin this year? I encourage you to write them down along with the things you long for and bring them to God. I'd love to hear what He says and what He does in your life this year. I'll keep you posted as my answers continue to crystallize. I've had some great direction from God and will tell you about them in another blog. :)
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
The Holidays
I have not gotten anything accomplished recently on any of my entrepreneurial pursuits. What has been accomplished has been Christmas parties, a graduation, a wedding, seeing clients who are struggling with the stress of the holidays, car drama, and more Christmas parties. We turned down a couple Christmas parties due to schedule conflicts (and the fact that my little introverted self might have blown into a million pieces at another party). The other thing I have gotten accomplished was to lose sleep obsessing over our need for a car as our lease is up in January.
I have been surfing the Internet for a month looking at cars, talking with our mechanic, (Euwayne from church who really is one of the kindest, most honorable men I know. Shout out to Euwayne!!) and combing the classifieds, looking for options. The problem is that I am a bit of a cheapskate with luxury tastes so I have been determined to find my dream car for dirt cheap. A few days ago I felt I hit pay dirt. A beautiful, red Lexus in the price range we had allocated. I called the dealership and asked for information.
Now for those of you who don't know me, I have a baby voice. Clients have told me they love it because it is soft and soothing, but on the phone I have often had telemarketers ask if my mommy is at home when I answer the ring. Sometimes I just say no and hang up. (Brilliant right?)
When I asked for information the salesman said they had just raised the price on the car. Chalk it up to lack of sleep but my brain told me that he just did it because I have a soft voice and he felt he could scam me. I kept my composure and told him no thank you and hung up the phone. After hanging up the phone expletives ran through my mind at a rapid pace and I had a strong urge to put my foot through the wall. This is not normal for me. I called my husband who got to see my rage first hand and the rest of the day I spent feeling shocked and ashamed of myself.
In the end, we decided to see if we could extend the lease on our car one more month (we can) and that we would give ourselves more time to look. My dear husband offered to take over browsing for our car. I imagine he's scared of a repeat of my emotional storm! What all this has left me with is a niggling voice in the back of my head saying, "You're never going to get these projects done. You're letting yourself get distracted." Sometimes the voice is meaner than that, but I choose these days not to listen to it.
Here is the thing...my life is mine. I surrender it to only One and what I know is that He was pleased and I was pleased as we went to the parties, graduations, and weddings, of people who we care about deeply. I think He was proud I was willing to walk away from a car I would have loved to drive. It is the right thing to do to focus on others and managing some sort of sanity through a holiday season that is often hectic at best, and a source of deep pain at worst. (I'm thinking of friends and clients who have painful memories, difficult family situations, etc.) So maybe the holidays put a pause on my projects, but I am committed to them. I will never give up. Knowing that, I choose to embrace all the holidays have to offer and look forward to projects that await me in January.
God bless all of you as you do the same.
I have been surfing the Internet for a month looking at cars, talking with our mechanic, (Euwayne from church who really is one of the kindest, most honorable men I know. Shout out to Euwayne!!) and combing the classifieds, looking for options. The problem is that I am a bit of a cheapskate with luxury tastes so I have been determined to find my dream car for dirt cheap. A few days ago I felt I hit pay dirt. A beautiful, red Lexus in the price range we had allocated. I called the dealership and asked for information.
Now for those of you who don't know me, I have a baby voice. Clients have told me they love it because it is soft and soothing, but on the phone I have often had telemarketers ask if my mommy is at home when I answer the ring. Sometimes I just say no and hang up. (Brilliant right?)
When I asked for information the salesman said they had just raised the price on the car. Chalk it up to lack of sleep but my brain told me that he just did it because I have a soft voice and he felt he could scam me. I kept my composure and told him no thank you and hung up the phone. After hanging up the phone expletives ran through my mind at a rapid pace and I had a strong urge to put my foot through the wall. This is not normal for me. I called my husband who got to see my rage first hand and the rest of the day I spent feeling shocked and ashamed of myself.
In the end, we decided to see if we could extend the lease on our car one more month (we can) and that we would give ourselves more time to look. My dear husband offered to take over browsing for our car. I imagine he's scared of a repeat of my emotional storm! What all this has left me with is a niggling voice in the back of my head saying, "You're never going to get these projects done. You're letting yourself get distracted." Sometimes the voice is meaner than that, but I choose these days not to listen to it.
Here is the thing...my life is mine. I surrender it to only One and what I know is that He was pleased and I was pleased as we went to the parties, graduations, and weddings, of people who we care about deeply. I think He was proud I was willing to walk away from a car I would have loved to drive. It is the right thing to do to focus on others and managing some sort of sanity through a holiday season that is often hectic at best, and a source of deep pain at worst. (I'm thinking of friends and clients who have painful memories, difficult family situations, etc.) So maybe the holidays put a pause on my projects, but I am committed to them. I will never give up. Knowing that, I choose to embrace all the holidays have to offer and look forward to projects that await me in January.
God bless all of you as you do the same.
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Finding My Purpose
Earlier this year, I participated in a series of two workshops called True You. The facilitators are friends and we are looking at partnering with them in a ministry we are connected to. I wasn’t really excited about giving up two full weekends, but I also feel strongly that as a therapist and entrepreneur, it is important for me to continue growing and never to lose sight of the feeling involved in being the other person “on the couch.” I never want to ask clients to do something I haven’t been willing to do myself. So I went. Gale and Kathy had already participated and raved about the impact it had on them.
The first weekend was hard. There were exercises that triggered me and at times I felt a lot of anger. After the first night I went home emotionally exhausted; but I also went home with profound new insights. One exercise had us addressing character defects that were holding us back. We had written each defect (about 15 of them for each person) on its own piece of paper and during the exercise two particular pieces of paper ended up right next to each other. One piece said “inhibited” and the other said “impatient”. I had been feeling both of those emotions most of my life but I had never put the paradox of both of those items together. Staring at those pieces of paper, it hit me like a 2x4 that I was the one holding myself back. Fears were keeping me inhibited. I was standing on the sidelines waiting for someone to ask me to dance rather than going out and doing my own dance...and I was IMPATIENT! There were goals I was tired of waiting on. Things I longed to experience.
I came by my fear honestly. I grew up in a family that was full of tension and anxiety. In many ways, that has changed, thank God, but I continued to wrestle with my fears. I had grand dreams and every time I would take a step in that direction, my fears would wake up like a coiled snake. The anxiety literally felt as if there was something twisting in my gut. The venom of that anxiety gave me stomach aches, GI issues, regular tension headaches...At some moments I felt it wasn’t worth the anxiety to take the next step. Years earlier, I woke with that snake writhing inside me and prayed that God would allow me to die. I wouldn’t take my life, but I fervently wished that God would let me go.
Fear had been a powerful motivator and I was sick of fighting it. Due to the work I had done over the years though, there had been some progress. I began to believe that fear would not be a constant and was something God didn’t intend for me. I got in my Bible and began to claim promises. I cried in my therapists office, yelled in the quiet of my room, and years later, went to True You and continued to face the final vestiges of my fear.
In the first weekend of True You you develop what they call “a contract” it is basically a short statement that sums up who you are. In the second weekend you develop a purpose statement. The whole weekend is built around helping participants find their purpose. Naming these two items has been transformative. It reminds me of my direction and keeps me grounded in who I was created to be. I never could have found them alone. It took the committed facilitators walking me through it and seeing what I don’t always see to come up with the short statement that now helps to define my direction.
“I am a powerful woman offering certainty in the face of fear.”
God is so ironic. You would be hard pressed to find someone more timid and scared at heart than I have been. But by growing through it. By surrendering. By fighting. By drenching myself in and clinging to God’s promises, I have become a powerful woman who offers certainty in the face of fear.
So here is something I’m certain about. You have the capacity to face your fears. You have the capacity to do that business you’ve dreamed of. You have the capacity to build the skill-set and take action. We hope you’ll join us in the journey. Let us share our trials and triumphs and let us listen and encourage you in yours.
The first weekend was hard. There were exercises that triggered me and at times I felt a lot of anger. After the first night I went home emotionally exhausted; but I also went home with profound new insights. One exercise had us addressing character defects that were holding us back. We had written each defect (about 15 of them for each person) on its own piece of paper and during the exercise two particular pieces of paper ended up right next to each other. One piece said “inhibited” and the other said “impatient”. I had been feeling both of those emotions most of my life but I had never put the paradox of both of those items together. Staring at those pieces of paper, it hit me like a 2x4 that I was the one holding myself back. Fears were keeping me inhibited. I was standing on the sidelines waiting for someone to ask me to dance rather than going out and doing my own dance...and I was IMPATIENT! There were goals I was tired of waiting on. Things I longed to experience.
I came by my fear honestly. I grew up in a family that was full of tension and anxiety. In many ways, that has changed, thank God, but I continued to wrestle with my fears. I had grand dreams and every time I would take a step in that direction, my fears would wake up like a coiled snake. The anxiety literally felt as if there was something twisting in my gut. The venom of that anxiety gave me stomach aches, GI issues, regular tension headaches...At some moments I felt it wasn’t worth the anxiety to take the next step. Years earlier, I woke with that snake writhing inside me and prayed that God would allow me to die. I wouldn’t take my life, but I fervently wished that God would let me go.
Fear had been a powerful motivator and I was sick of fighting it. Due to the work I had done over the years though, there had been some progress. I began to believe that fear would not be a constant and was something God didn’t intend for me. I got in my Bible and began to claim promises. I cried in my therapists office, yelled in the quiet of my room, and years later, went to True You and continued to face the final vestiges of my fear.
In the first weekend of True You you develop what they call “a contract” it is basically a short statement that sums up who you are. In the second weekend you develop a purpose statement. The whole weekend is built around helping participants find their purpose. Naming these two items has been transformative. It reminds me of my direction and keeps me grounded in who I was created to be. I never could have found them alone. It took the committed facilitators walking me through it and seeing what I don’t always see to come up with the short statement that now helps to define my direction.
“I am a powerful woman offering certainty in the face of fear.”
God is so ironic. You would be hard pressed to find someone more timid and scared at heart than I have been. But by growing through it. By surrendering. By fighting. By drenching myself in and clinging to God’s promises, I have become a powerful woman who offers certainty in the face of fear.
So here is something I’m certain about. You have the capacity to face your fears. You have the capacity to do that business you’ve dreamed of. You have the capacity to build the skill-set and take action. We hope you’ll join us in the journey. Let us share our trials and triumphs and let us listen and encourage you in yours.
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Matt Lloyd Presentation
Our intention in writing this blog is to provide emotional as well as practical support for women entrepreneurs. (Men are welcomed as well, but you may notice the focus is distinctly feminine!) The topics will be broad and varied and today I wanted to share with you a video presentation by Matt Lloyd. This is an EXCELLENT presentation for those of you who are marketing online (or want to learn to market online.)
Online marketing is the vehicle our team has chosen for our company for several reasons. The main one being that all of us are tired of lengthy meetings that may or may not yield a sale. We realized that in order to really expand our team we needed to find other like minded women and make it our goal to see them succeed. With the internet we can do this from home in our pajamas. (Which is what I’m in right now!)
Matt is young and cute and even if you aren’t interested in online marketing, you should check out his fabulous accent! The video is approximately 90 minutes + the introduction by Jonathan Budd who is a young guy who has taken online marketing to a new level and finds himself a multi-millionaire at a young age. I hope you enjoy!
Online marketing is the vehicle our team has chosen for our company for several reasons. The main one being that all of us are tired of lengthy meetings that may or may not yield a sale. We realized that in order to really expand our team we needed to find other like minded women and make it our goal to see them succeed. With the internet we can do this from home in our pajamas. (Which is what I’m in right now!)
Matt is young and cute and even if you aren’t interested in online marketing, you should check out his fabulous accent! The video is approximately 90 minutes + the introduction by Jonathan Budd who is a young guy who has taken online marketing to a new level and finds himself a multi-millionaire at a young age. I hope you enjoy!
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